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The Pentangle Day
The Pentangle, or Pentacle, is a five pointed star which represents the five virtues of medieval knights: courtesy, generosity, chastity, fellowship/friendship and piety. This symbol is encased by a circle. The star itself is called a Pentagram and represents humanity, while the enclosing circle represents Spirit and Nature. The greater meaning symbolizes the relationship between humanity and Spirit; it represents how to be in the world at any given moment in time. Its very design shows how Spirit is in all, through all and around all. The Pentagram star inside the circle is the human ensconced, surrounded by and in Spirit. This relationship affirms the presence of Spirit at all times, but requires the human being to be aware of it. Back of this awareness is the answer to the question, "what is mine to do?". Spirit informs us to be courteous, generous, chaste, friendly and pious. Else, how would we know this is the right way to be?
Recently, I awoke, wondering who I am, why I am here, what is mine to do. These questions arose from some inner place, dormant for periods of time, but rising up again now for some reason. It's not the first time I have had these questions, but in the past, I have always been guided in the most perfect way.
Twenty years ago when these questions came up, I found myself dealing with a professional crisis. I had just come back from a music tour in Japan and my work prospects back home were not that good. I began looking for jobs, thinking I didn't have enough resources and seriously began doubting who I was. Spirit was speaking, but I was not hearing. I knew I had to do something to resurrect my musical career. Meanwhile, Spirit just continued telling me to be courteous, generous, chaste, friendly and pious. In my mental state, it was hard to hear this sweet voice. I turned away and tried to ignore this constant battle in my mind, thinking the nagging would go away, but it did not. I became depressed. The still small voice in my mind continued letting me know that if I listened, I would be guided to some right action. "Don't be afraid", it urged me.
At that point I began listening to Spirit. I affirmed my identity as a composer. I knew that arranging, producing and publishing was my "to do". Soon after, I joined the independent publishing group (AIMP) thinking it would force me to network with others and I would no longer be depressed. At the first luncheon meeting, I found myself at a table with nine other music pros. Instantly, I was engaged in conversation, already looking forward to the next meeting. At this point, I was not only listening, I was following Spirit's instructions!
After a couple years, I opened a recording studio. There, I not only worked on my own music, but helped many clients with musical services such as recording, producing writing rehearsing and arranging. I was no longer depressed and life was good. I was "on the map". This time was life-changing for me. When I looked inside and listened, Spirit told me what to do. At that time I released the cd, "Look Inside", a collection of songs illustrating the principles of Science of Mind and embarked on a journey which allowed me to become a licensed Spiritual Practitioner.
Now, twenty years later, I find myself asking again, "what is mine to do?". Why is this coming up now? What does Spirit want from me now? Why is it so persistent? Why am I feeling disconnected, dissatisfied at this point? I am successful in the world - closed the studio a few years ago and have not done much touring since Covid shut most of it down. But I have a music residency at one of the best spots in the world and as music director of Ahiah CSL, I continue doing the work of Spirit. Why then am I having these yucky feelings? My energy level is lower, I sleep more and my body aches more. Is this just aging symptoms? Once again, I needed to look inside and open my mind so that I could hear what Spirit wants for me. It turns out that this is
exactly what I needed to do. The answer came almost as soon as I shut my eyes in meditation. Spirit said loud and clear:
"You need to exercise". "You need to stay vibrant and healthy."
For weeks and months, Spirit was saying this to me, but instead of listening, I resisted, thinking it was too much bother to reserve a swimming lane at the local YMCA. Furthermore, I thought, even if I reserve a lane, I don't like the to share a lane with another swimmer. What was I thinking? These were just excuses; meanwhile, Spirit relentlessly persisted until last week when I finally made a reservation. Turns out, I didn't even have to share the lane! I now am swimming two to three times a week and those feelings of non-worthiness and despair have all but vanished. The light shines brightly as I swim. The Pentangle shimmers in all its glory as Spirit as me.